Home / Motherhood / Barrister masters homeworking by telling kids ‘thing you see inside this room is not your mother’
Barrister masters homeworking by telling kids 'thing you see inside this room is not your mother'

Barrister masters homeworking by telling kids ‘thing you see inside this room is not your mother’

Don’t mess with the law! Homeworking barristers share VERY strict ‘no entry’ rules for their kids – including one saying ‘the thing you see is not your mother‘ and ‘hunger isn’t an emergency’A UK barrister who shared a photo of the no-nonsense memo that hangs on her door to dissuade her children from entering while she’s at work has gone viralBridget Dolan QC wrote ‘the thing you see inside this room is not your mother‘Added that she would only leave her office for emergencies, and hunger isn’t considered an emergency – only extreme pain and episodes of bleeding counted   Other legal professionals from around the globe have shared snaps of their own notices – and they’re all equally unforgiving in tone, it seemsCoronavirus symptoms: what are they and should you see a doctor?

A top London barrister forced to work from home during the coronavirus lockdown has issued an unapologetic memo to her children about when she can and cannot be disturbed – and has seen her note spark some equally unforgiving missives from other legal professionals.  

Bridget Dolan QC, from London, shared the memo, typed in red and black ink, which she’s hung from her office door to stop her children disturbing her while she’s working from home on Twitter. 

The formal note advises said offspring that ‘the thing you see inside this room is not your mother‘ and suggests that she’s under strain from responding to a ‘tsunami of emails’.

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‘Extreme pain and an episode of bleeding only’: In a gloriously tongue-in-cheek missive shared on Twitter, London QC Bridget Dolan laid out circumstances to her children that would see her leave her office while working – and their hunger isn’t one of them

The searingly candid poster begins: ‘Important Notice. Directed to all inhabitants. Your Mother is not here.’

The barrister, who specialises in public and civil law, then goes on to outline the excessive workload that she’s facing as legal hearings and conferences are conducted at home via meeting software. 

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Suggesting that she might be roused for a medical emergency, classified as ‘extreme pain or an episode of bleeding that lasts beyond three minutes’, she makes it clear that hunger is not one such scenario. 

When the note is tacked on the door, ‘the thing inside’ can ‘perform no parental functions’, it reads.  

Tweeting about her directive, Doland said: ‘Day 2 of isolation. Kids coping better than me. Very happy to email anyone who wants it a copy of the essential document I needed to draft this am.’ 

Family barrister Rachel Chan shared this snap of her seven-year-old daughter, who’d made her mum a coloured sign warning of ‘court hearing in progress’

Simple but effective, this missive says it as it is. Right: Don’t let those pooches in…a working from home legal professional fears a doggy disturbance

Simon Myerson QC, @SCynic1, on Twitter added his own sign, saying: ‘The maternal approach is softer I see. My study door…’

Straight-talking: This one resorts to a little fruity language to hammer home the message

The tongue-in-cheek memo has since been shared around the legal profession globally, attracting over 8,000 views and similar notes from similarly-stressed QCs.  

@EdaleSkyline enquired: ‘Good work. But wondering if you could beef up the bleeding clause. Three minutes isn’t that long really. Most children have quite a lot of blood in them.’ 

@CiaranMcQuade wished he’d stuck a similar note on his door, recounting: ‘I wish I’d thought of this before my son walked in the room earlier, midway through a cmc, whilst signing Rick Astley’s never gonna give you up. Thankfully the judge laughed.’ 

@LKMagill wrote: ‘I love it!! Sonny know how parents are doing it. My head is exploding keeping up with work/emails/changing court directives and I only have two dogs to consider!’



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